Uncommon Decency – by Richard Mouw

Here are some quotes from a book that I read recently. Its an older book, but given to me by my wife for my birthday. It was given partially because I am generally interested in the topic, but specifically because of some legal issues that we are facing. The book is entitled, “Uncommon Decency – Christian Civilty in an Uncivil World” written by Richard Mouw in 1992.

“Civilty is public politeness. It means that we display tact, moderation, refinement and good manners toward people who are different from us. It isn’t enough to make an outward show of politeness. Being civil has an inner side as well… to be civil is to genuinely care about the larger society. It requires a heartfelt commitment to our fellow citizens. It is a willingness to promote the wellbeing of people who are very different, including people who seriously disagreed with you on important matters.” p12

“Being civil is a way of becoming more like what God intends us to be.” p13

“Every human being is a center of value. The value may not always be obvious to us. This is why we have to go out of our way to reflect upon the value of specific human beings. We Christians can do this by reminding ourselves that the person in question is created by God….every human being is a work of divine art….even when we have rebelled against God and distorted his handiwork in our lives, he continues to love us…” p24

“Reflecting on people’s capabilities for betterment is a way of cultivating a gentle and reverent spirit toward them.” p25

“Each of us must attempt to be faithful in the situations where God has placed us and with the resources God has made available to us….our calling is not to bring the kingdom of God in its fullness, it is to witness to the power and presence of that kingdom in ways that are made available to us.” p38

Here is a quote that has a similar theme to the quotes from Miroslav Volf that I presented in a previous blog:

“Honor everyone (I Peter 2:17). Honoring here means having an active regard for someone’s well being. Not that we are simply to give people what they ask for or tell them only what they want to hear… this is what civility is all about: honoring other people – even people whose beliefs and actions we dislike – in a manner that is gentle and reverent.” p44

“Convicted Christians will often be tempted by the crusading spirit. A rule of thumb is necessary. For starters, concentrate on your own sinfulness and on the other person’s humanness. We become more civil by gaining a more honest picture of ourselves and others.” p55

“We learn to act in a way that honors God’s perspective on reality. Having been aware of being seen by God, we can actively being to see in a more truthful and civil manner.” p58

“When we break out of the bonds of self centeredness, entering into the experiences of other people, we come closer to fulfilling God’s purposes for human beings. And we become more Christlike, since the incarnation (entry of Jesus into our world) is the ultimate ministry of empathy.” p63

“Christian people need a strong sense of curiosity. This is God’s world, and we ought to want to understand it better. And since human beings are such an important part of the divine scheme – fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:4), we out to be very curious about the full range of human experience. We want to learn about people who are very different from ourselves…we shouldn’t be too quick to reject the other person’s point of view.” p64

“I have a theological hunch about the diversity of cultural perspectives. I think that many of these differences were a part of God’s good plan from the beginning….the diversity of race, ethnicity and geographic temperament…..the human race as a whole also has the image of God in a collective sense – so that the rich diversity of cultures on the face of the earth shows forth the splendor of God in a way that no individual or group does alone.” p78

“The best leadership is what James MacGregor Burns labels the transforming kind. This happens when both leaders and followers are willing to be changed by their relationship – each party wants to be raised to higher levels of motivation and morality, so that their interaction will have a transforming effect on both.” p111

“Transforming leadership requires that we genuinely listen to others, that we be empathetically open to their point of view on matters that concern them deeply….genuine listening involves a willingness to be changed by what we hear. We cannot hope to transform others without a commitment to being transformed ourselves.” p113

“Christians never have the right to become less than civil people – our only option is to move beyond mere civility.” p129

“In some circumstances, what we think at the time to be a bold moral stand may prove to be a futile gesture that will be quickly forgotten by everyone but ourselves.” p130

I particularly like the following quotation – I am trying to use it as a directive in the current legal battle that I am involved with.

“Being civil means that we never forget that they (others) are indeed persons who are created in God’s image and who are still within the reach of divine mercy. It means we can think about cutting off conversation with them only when it becomes clear that they are, by their clear intent to harm the lives of other persons, asking us to do so. And it means that we may never let go of the hope that they may yet flourish as creatures who have the potential to glorify their Maker.”  p132

“Christian civility takes human freedom seriously. I may want people to believe as I do about some basic matters – but what I want is for them to choose to see things that way. This means that I must rely on testimony and persuasion in presenting my views to them. Civil Christians will be very reluctant to endorse moral and religious programs that rely on coercion.” p143

“Christian civility will display the patience that comes from knowing that the final accounting belongs to God.” p143

“Learning civility is learning to imitate God’s patient dealings with his rebellious creatures.” p145

“When the biblical writers encourage us to show our confidence in Christ’s triumph, they do not tell us to do so by claiming our victory prize here and now. Instead, we best demonstrate our participation in the benefits of Christ’s redemptive work by our willingness to suffer in a Christlike manner as we await the outcome that he has secured.” p 152

“The recognition that God’s standards of truth and morality are the only reliable reference points for our lives should instill in us a humble spirit” p166